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Conscious Ways of Dealing with Your Family Over The Holidays

As we prepare for the American Thanksgiving, Christmas and Chanukah, my friends talk of plans to go home to be with their families for the holidays.

What’s surprising to me, is that the tone in their voice isn’t one of excitement or anticipation, but more of dread and obligation.

Looking Within

Because we share similar psychological and emotional makeups, our family members know exactly what buttons to push to activate those dreaded holiday situations.

Also, since everyone is a reflection of ourselves, aspects that we clearly see in others are often aspects that are strongest in ourselves. When we react negatively, we are most often reacting to attributes that we also possess – but are unwilling to embrace.

We spend a lot of energy denying our shadowy side, and what usually happens, is that we end up projecting those shadowy qualities onto others.

Your relationships exist only in your mind. Whatever power they have over you – you’ve given to them. Whatever you feel is missing or wrong, is a gauge that something is missing in you. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be bothered by it.

Turn Up Your Love Light

Be in a state of presence and give yourself the gift of being free from low-energy vibrations like blame, regret, anxiety, despair, or worse, hatred. Remind yourself to breathe deeply.

Find more time to meditate. Remain in a state of peace and stay hooked up to your Divine Source. Remember that you are in control of your power to love, so let your love light shine strong and bright.

Remain silent. Turn up your internal pure consciousness dimmer up to the high position. Remember to stay centered and present.

Just think less and be more. Bite your tongue. Send out feelings of love for yourself and for others. Feel your emotions soften and quiet down. Tell yourself that everybody is doing the best they can in this moment.

If it gets too intense, go out for a walk and clear your head.

I think the greatest source of misery and hatred in this world is clinging to past hurts.

In three thousand years, man has fought five thousand wars. To me, forgiveness is such an important component in learning to love ourselves, I wrote a song about it called:  “I Choose Forgiveness,” From the CD “Soul Affirmation Music for Better Outcomes.”

Lyric for I Choose Forgiveness

Forgiveness is simply a decision to let go of resentments. It doesn’t mean that you deny the other person’s responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn’t mean that you minimize or justify the wrong.

It brings you the peace of mind that lets you get on with your life. Letting go of grudges and bitterness clears the way for compassion, kindness and peace.

When You Forgive, You Get:

  • Healthier relationships
  • Psychological well-being
  • Less stress and hostility
  • Lower blood pressure
  • Fewer symptoms of depression, anxiety and chronic pain
  • Lower risk of alcohol and substance abuse.

Forgiveness is arguably the most important issue we must address as a human race. Therefore, it’s not surprising that tolerance, and loving thy neighbor as thyself, is the central theme of so many religions.

If we are to survive and evolve into a loving, compassionate world, we must recognize and adopt a lifestyle of forgiveness. If you don’t learn to forgive yourself, how can you forgive others?

Forgive Yourself
Forgive Your Family
Forgive Your Friends
Forgive Your Country
Forgive The World
Forgive Yourself

The grudge you hold on to is like a hot coal that you intend to throw at someone, only you’re the one who gets burned.– Siddhartha Gautama

The only abnormality is the incapacity to love.- Anais Nin

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.– Rumi

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